trust thyself + chia seed giveaway winner

Today my post “What Healthy Means to Me” is up on Healthy Living Blogs.  Stop by and check it out if you get the chance!

warning: the following is a bit emotional and maybe even a little self indulgent.  Feel free to bypass my emotional ramblings and get straight to the giveaway winner:)

It has been a crazy past couple of days here at our house.  I was up the husband’s office with him until late last night and then it was back up and at ’em early this morning.  He is currently planning a huge work event that all comes to a head tonight and tomorrow afternoon, and I’m playing the role of doting and supportive wife.  When he’s crazy, it means I’m crazy too:)

However, it seems that time has come to a screeching halt today and tomorrow as I’ll be holding down the fort here at home, while he’s working.  I have to admit, it’s getting a little lonely this afternoon.  He’ll be gone until late tonight and then again all day long tomorrow.  Insert sad face.

But the good news is that it’s Labor Day weekend!  So we’ll get an extra day to make up for it.

This morning we unfortunately didn’t manage to pull ourselves out of bed in time for a workout, but it was week number three for my PiYo class!  I felt like class went more smoothly today than ever, which made me a happy girl.  It was somewhere around halfway through class when the thought suddenly jumped into my head that I’m doing (one element of) exactly what I want to do.  Since I left my job in June, each week has been kind of a rollercoaster of emotions.  I’ve given myself the freedom to pursue exactly what I want to do…but I never realized that could be so difficult.  It’s difficult to keep pushing forward when there’s no promise that anything will work out.  But I know that if I don’t keep moving toward my goals, I’ll never get there…and it would be a tragedy to not give it everything I have.

Today, as every Friday, I received Kris Carr’s newsletter in my inbox.  Always a highlight of my Friday.  She does a weekly vlog and today one thing she talked about was trusting yourself.  It made me think back to June, when I was battling doubt and doubt’s evil twin, fear.  Doubt and fear followed me everywhere I went and wormed their way into the depths of my mind.  They nagged at me constantly, creating scenarios of what would happen if I didn’t give into them.  But I didn’t give in.  Somehow despite all the insecurity and reliance on everyone but myself, I did go with my gut.  I made the best decision I could have made.  I haven’t really seen the full fruit of that decision yet…but I have hope that someday soon I will.

I’m just remembering today how truly important it is to block out all the noise of my life and truly listen to the Lord and to myself.  I often get so caught up in relying on other people (and even society) to steer me in the right direction, forgetting to trust my instinct and not second guess myself.

Contemplating all this is leaving me feeling emotional…and nostalgic for the past in a way.  Many times when I think about the past or see pictures of myself in the past, it reminds me of all the things I’ve been through and tough decisions I’ve made, and I realize how strong I really am.

graduated college

moved to Thailand

lived here for a week

lived through a week of tsunami relief work (major milestone during our year in Thailand)

learned to step out of my comfort zone (and that I love mountain biking)

performed a tradition Thai dance and made a Thai best friend

became a high school English teacher (pic taken right before school started)

ran a half marathon

ran a full marathon

And now I’ve left my job and am pursuing an entirely new direction.  I know that in a matter of months I will look back on pictures of today and be nostalgic for this time in my life.  Isn’t that always the way it works?  We want things to move ahead…we want to get to the next point in life, and then when we arrive there, we suddenly realize just how sweet the past really was.

I’m working on living more in the moment and loving each day for exactly what it is.  For exactly what I’m doing now.  I’ve never been too good at it.  But I’m getting better.

How well do you feel like you trust yourself?  Do you usually feel comfortable going with your gut feeling or do you tend to second guess yourself?

Apologies if this post is a little self indulgent, but these are just some things I’m processing through.  I love blogging for that very reason.  It gives me a free outlet to explore my thoughts through writing…and even get feedback and support from amazing people.  Where else can you get that?!

Let’s not make this all about me though.  It’s time to announce the winner of the chia seed giveaway!  First I have to say thanks so much to everyone who entered!  I loved getting to “see” some new faces – and  I absolutely loved hearing your adventure stories.  So fun to learn more about you guys!

The winner of the two pound bag of chia seeds, so graciously donated by Chia Seeds Direct is….

Dorry @ Living with Healthy Hunger

Congrats Dorry!  I hope you enjoy your chia seeds!  Email me with your info and your chia seeds will be on their way:)

Don’t forget to click on over to Chia Seeds Direct.  They have great prices and free shipping on my favorite little seed of all time:)

Hope you guys have a relaxing Friday evening!  What kind of plans do you have for Labor Day weekend? Jon and I will be staying at home to recuperate from the crazy work week:)